IF

 

Hey you,

It has been a while. Well, I have been all over and nowhere at the same time. Being a grown-up is hard and tiring. I don’t know how my folks did all this and still had time to argue with me about my ideologies. More grace and love to them. I hope y’all have been tackling life well. Fighting your battles every day and in as much as you may lose some, I hope you also win some.

I write because I just watched John Krasinski’s new movie “IF” and am a mess since I teared up and laughed. It was a cute movie. *Spoiler Alert* It has a beautiful ending. It has been a while since I watched a movie with a happy ending. Most if not, all have been ending in suspense then I spend the next few hours coming up with theories and I watch the second part and wonder why they had to make the sequel.

But there’s something about this one – IF. “Imaginary Friend” is what IF stands for and as an African child or say a Kenyan one I have never had an imaginary friend. I say this because my imaginations run wild. I’d watch a Jackie Chan movie or Jet Lee and trust me I would be in the streets jumping from poles like them. Being a “fully trained martial artist” together with my friend Sam.

Sam, I met him a few weeks back and he is a proud husband and a father of two and here I am complaining about the price of coffee, but why is it so damn expensive. But Sam and I would always fight after watching these movies. We would act the part, be ninjas. We had black pull-neck shirts and black pants and we would wrap ropes around our chests so that they could hold a sword at the back and one by the side. Then we would have a crash of our swords before we threw them and the kicks started. Now, do not think that we were not hitting each other intending to hurt each other because we did hurt each other. I have scars to prove my case. He has a scar close to his eye after an “arrow” made of a thorn, straw and a feather grazed his eye.

Now, this is what our imaginations were like. But we never had imaginary friends. I made a joke that they were embracing Schizophrenia since they actually saw and conversed with these Imaginary Friends but there weren’t enough hahas so maybe y’all will laugh. However, I have grown up and Sam has his new priorities and as much as we reminisce about those days, they can never come back to us. Now Sam is more of an acquittance and he has his family and well, I have me.

This now makes me want an Imaginary Friend… to not feel alone. I say this since I have been feeling lonelier as days go by and yes there’s the solution of getting a wife but I do not feel ready yet. So, I have me and I am not cutting it anymore. I had this whole idea that living alone would be fun but as I am seated here in darkness since KPLC has seen it fit to play with the lights, I have the desire to be with someone. You know, for someone to fill the void of silence that fills my space when I walk in through my door.

I think most humans are actually afraid of being alone. I suppose that’s why there has been this new lie going around called ‘solitude’. It’s okay to be alone but not that alone if you know what I mean. There’s that reggae song that sings, “No man is an island” and I think the composer understood the significance of friends in our lives. Friends, I have many of those. I can make one very fast but again churning the fires of friendship is becoming a trifling job and I am not cut out for it anymore. I have many, then I have a few and I have one and his name is Jesus (another haha moment). But yes I have these friends but they are not here at this particular moment.

I mean I can call one and talk for minutes since hours is a luxury I no longer have and this lonely feeling would pass but it would wait for me and I would have to face it again. Now, the question is, would it be a better idea to get an imaginary friend? Would I be transversing the realm of crazy if I did that? But again, I would no longer be alone as much since I would have this made-up character and I would feel as though I am never alone. It’s a funny theory and I guess I will make that choice tomorrow but tonight I call a friend and yap.

If you are alone then you can call me. I will probably not pick up but the idea will be cute. Talking of alone, today my peer got married. Ms. Wahinya or should I say Mrs. Masibo. Jesus Christ, my peers are really married. Ninazeeka… We from Blossom Gram congratulate you and wish you all the love and care that this new phase will need to sustain you.

Again, Love, Peace, and for God's sake lower the price of coffee!!!!

Love,

 

Thairu.