Her: Why did you stop writing?
Him: ummmmmmmmm………..
Dear YOU,
Psst! It’s been a while. I have been
riding the wave called life and I’ve capsized a couple of times and drowned
then got myself back to shore and did it all over again. I had been doing this
for a while then finally it was my anniversary. I have been here for 300 months,
9131 days, 219,144 hours, 13,148,640 minutes, 788,918,400 seconds. It has been
a short but long time since I can’t remember most of the things that
have happened over all those minutes.
A lot has happened over the years. I
have been beaten, I have had a few misdirected crushes, I have loved, I have
been loved, I have hated, I have been hated, I have cried, I have laughed, I
have been sick and I have been healthy but above all else, I have been alive. I
have lived.
I became what most people refer to as
rebellious since I tend to do what I please. I refuted the idea of being
controlled by experiences and advice from people who have not walked in my shoes. I
refuted the idea of being afraid to try since I only get one shot at this life
thing.
Life to me is a funny concept. We get
born and what happens happens and we die. That’s odd, isn’t it? But I am
expected to follow some manual created by the fears of men to limit myself and
regret the life I lived when I die. That is sad and sadness is a whale that is
ever ready to swallow you whole. You drown in it and finally die while
searching for the light not knowing you were the actual light you were
searching for.
It’s odd how everything you will ever
need will come from you. Happiness, Zest for Life, Sadness, Joy, Patience… all
these are in you, and like a game character you only need to level up and access
more attributes. Now, most of us don’t know this. We never get the chance to know
this as we get to live by the leash created by the homes we were born in.
There’s a channel on YouTube named; Soft
White Underbelly and the host gets to navigate through the life
choices of most of the characters and what led them to do what they did or are
doing and the responses always have me shaken. My life is not so different from
some of the characters but I was always conscious of where a certain road would
lead me to. Sadly, most people do not have this compass. They do because they
were told to do it, they think that way since they were taught to think like
that and then since we do not have all this information about how they grew up
we start judging them. Judging their choices, judging their thoughts, judging
their way of life while being ignorant of the fact that they live their lives
at peace knowing what they know and thinking their trained thoughts…
That is scary to me. I have always
questioned everything; my faith, why I think that way, why you think that way,
why I made that choice, why, why, why… and you also want to tell me that there
are people who do not question anything!!!!!! They do it just because they were
told to, they think since they were taught to… Seems like a limited life to me, but a full
life to them, and I must understand this.
But, that is my opinion. Growing up, I realized that how these ‘people’ lead their lives is none of my
concern. They are content and if I impose my opinion on their lifestyle then that would make me the villain in their stories. Hence, I must walk through life
accepting all these things and letting men be men.
So, why did I stop writing? I didn’t.
I just got lost in the sea of trying to understand men. They are fascinating creatures. Some are
moved by fear, others by curiosity and some just live silently and pass on
silently too. They are human. Beautiful creatures that are loveable from a
distance but you’d be full of disdain for them if you got too close.
I have learned, I am still learning to
not impose my thoughts on men and just lead a life where I view them as “UFOs”
(Understandable Fervent Ordeals).
Love,
Thairu.
❤️❤️❤️
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