I AM?

Hello You, 

Who are you? Who am I? Maybe this is a common case of not knowing my identity yet, but who knows who they are. Aren’t we a construct of other people’s ideas about who we should become? Okay, this is what I mean; When we are born most of our parents or maybe just mine already had a vision about who we will become. “He will be a doctor or an engineer”, then we grow up and get our interests but still there’s a voice at the back of your heads, “become what your parents wanted you to be”. Or am I alone in this? 

Yesterday a certain lady asked if I was authentic at all and I came to the conclusion that I am not. There isn’t anything original about me, or maybe there is and I may not have known it. I believe we are a simple case of monkey see monkey do, and sorry if you take any offense in this but it is my opinion. We tend to do or become what we see or are told to do. There is always a higher authority that instructs our reason for doing things.

Now, this becomes a conflict of two ideologies. On one hand, I want to do what makes me happy and that is writing (The relief that I get from just sitting down and vibing on a sheet of paper – I suppose I’d do this forever) but on the other hand, my parents want me to do something that will bring food to the table, something that will sustain me and my to be family and also ensure they are comfortable. 

Well, am still stubborn about writing because it is fun for me but my, our parents are considering time in the essence that I need to be serious about my, our future. Yes, some of us are already doing something that they love and it’s paying their bills (cheers to them) but I believe there are some of me out there too. Those of us who see art as an escape from reality, a place we get to be our best selves and not worry about the ideologies of people but are still broke (this is embarrassing) but we are. We may not know how to become what is expected of us yet and I believe we will soon enough. 

Let it be known that I still want us to be comfortable in our lives but also, I would not like us to look back and regret not enjoying ourselves during our youth. Not fully evolving in our different arts because we decided to follow other people’s precepts. Am I preaching disobedience? I don’t think so, I am not telling you and also myself not to follow what we are told if it works out for us, but that we should not forget to live and enjoy ourselves by doing what we love. 

It might be music, drawing (p.s. y’all should go to Instagram and look up my boys' pieces @supreme_imprints) or it could be writing as you listen to ‘Claire de lune by Claude Debussy’ waiting for a cup of tea (I don’t know why they are taking this long to bring one). The bottom line is, get a hobby if you already don’t have one, go wild but still be safe (ironic much), get as many experiences as you can then you’ll have many stories to tell your kids and grandkids, and If God wills it, your great-grandkids about how wild you were in your youth.  

Since we will continue to be caged by the constricts of society let us try to be free that we can also teach others freedom. Now don’t forget to click like and subscribe (I’ve always wanted to say this, might create a YouTube channel). Be safe and try to be free.