BLOSSOM GRAM

                                                                         I feel Unloved, Not in the sense that someone doesn’t love me, But in the sense that I don’t feel it, So, either I am the problem, Or maybe there wasn’t any love, to begin with, Maybe it was something I made up in my mind to make me feel okay, At a time when I felt lost, lonely, and a little unloved, Maybe I am starting to think that you didn’t fall in love with me, You just stayed for the time being because it made you feel something, And now the only feeling I feel, Is nothing!   Bonjour Les Oiseaux, It’s not long since I wrote my last letter. I rather enjoyed the last one and I am here seated listening to From Score to Film – About Time , and I am enveloped in the sweet melody and beautiful memories ...

  Hello, John: Quick question? Doe: Ahaa John: So, umm are you controlling? Doe: Nope or I don’t think I am. I am territorial John: What does that mean? Territorial… Doe: It means (he went on about it but I didn’t really understand what he said) John: Okay okay. So what does that mean? Doe: That I am territorial and not controlling…   I am controlling. I don’t like it when things related to my life do not move in a way that I can’t predict. It’s a problem I know but I am willing to accept help for it. I like control and I can offer up so many justifiable reasons why it should be allowed when I am involved but it is still wrong if I take this control to another person. I am right and they are wrong. I have gone through it and I know that is wrong but I happened to meet people who continuously defy me and do as they please and I am left to accept it and move forward. This is a very toxic trait and yes I will need all the help I can get for it but I don’t th...

  And when nobody wakes you up in the morning, And when nobody waits for you at night, And when you can do whatever you want, What do you call it? Freedom or Loneliness?   Dear Life, I’ve been thinking lately about what you are. So, I took it upon myself to enquire about who people thought you were and the answers were sad and depressing. I did not find anyone who claimed that you were good. All of them claimed that all the bad things that had happened to them was their definition of you. (I found it sad that they did not know that you made SZA go through a heartbreak and she released SOS… it's all about finding happiness in everything)   So, is life all pain? Is it the bad that happens to us? Is it the realization that nothing matters no matter how much we try? What is it really?... I consider life as what happens during my day or night. I try not to dwell on the bad or the good, I just view it as things that just are. So today I didn’t have lunch, okay… Today ...