BLOSSOM GRAM

Dearly Beloved, It's been six years since I said I'd watch this piece, La La Land. I've been afraid, though, afraid that it might become my life. A line reads that whoever is afraid of suffering is already suffering from what they fear, and clearly, I have become it.  Seb says that he is letting life hit him till it gets tired then he will hit back and that line made me laugh as life has been hitting me lately. A line reads that don't kick a man whose on the ground but life didn't get the memo since I've been receiving my daily share of kicks everyday. You know, life not being as I had envisioned it as a child. Be married at 25 and have cars and houses and horses and kids... and now I can barely follow through a movie as I need rest.  Mia and Seb are what I had and what I craved for so I understood their story. How both of them sought after their dreams and worked towards them but then life chose different trajectories for them and life seemed good but they were...

  A quote read, “It’s hard to wait for something you know might not happen but it’s even harder to give up when you know it’s everything you want.” The quote felt timely. I read it at a time when I struggled with letting go. I don’t want to, though. She was mine, but she wasn’t. She might never be, but I want her to be. Why? Umm... because she is everything! What does that mean? I also can’t tell but I know that she is everything I currently think life is. It’s happiness, sadness, peace, anger, a thin line between crazy and tranquility and I crave to have that forever. You make me want to make mistakes You turn temptation into my best friend You make me just give up and cave Will I ever fall in love like this again? She gaslights me into thinking that crazy is normal. She pushes my boundaries, and I want to try everything at least once. The whole time, I am certain that the ideas are extreme, but I am exhilarated, and I love the thrill it brings. I have tried fallin...

Dear Reader, The year is 2003; My mum is an introvert and she was a new mum to this ball of energy and as discipline for not obeying her (nilikataa kuwasha jiko) she made me sit with my dad. Now my dad was a silent man, (was since we rant a lot when we meet), and I “feared” the man. I don’t have a valid reason why, but silent people give me the creeps. So, as I sat with this man of little to no words, he tuned in to Nation TV and this new segment started playing. “Smallville”, a little kid falls from the sky in a pod and a few months of binging this show and the kid is now an adult who flies and can shoot lasers from his eyes. Clark quickly became my favorite character and there was this babe, Lana! The year is 2004 and I was turning 5 that year.  Now, I could already tell what was attractive and what wasn’t and Lana was the most beautiful on-screen lady I had known. She was dating Clark and there was this bald man called Lex and then she started dating that guy and I was flipp...

Dearly Beloved,   Love is awful It’s awful! It’s painful! It’s frightening! Makes you doubt yourself! Judge yourself! Distance yourself from the other people in your life. Makes you selfish. Makes you creepy! Makes you obsessed with your hair! Makes you CRUEL! Makes you say and do things you never thought you would do! It’s all any of us want, and its hell when we get there! So, no wonder... It’s something we don’t want to do on our own. And Love, isn’t something that weak people do. Being a romantic takes a hell of a lot of hope. I think what they mean is, when you find somebody that you love, it feels like hope. So be strong, and take heart all you who hope.   To Love... I can take you back to the first time I had a crush on a lady. She was way older and so light skin and I thought she was white (she wasn’t). Then I was Batman for a night and injured my friend and his sister reprimanded me and God was she beautiful (My second crush...